sumpah qq jaro bun

sudah lama saya tidak mengunjungi blog saya pribadi hehehe...sibuk dan malas...sekarang pun sudah mengantuk...

tapi ada yg mau saya tulis ni:

28 oct 2007. sumpah bun jaro qq : bun jaro qq ingin terus punya satu cinta, cinta hippo hon qt cynk. Punya satu bahasa, bahasa cinta dan kangen ;D
28 oct 2007, 7:28pm

sooooo cuteeeeeeee....so romantic....
my dear jaro bun, i luv u!!!!
i always enjoy your 'gombal2' words....kekekekekek....

Pdt. Amin Tjung

30 menit yang lalu sebuah sms masuk ke handphone saya, dari seorang teman paduan suara di gereja, bunyinya:

Pak Amin telah pulang ke rumah Bapa di sorga jam 8.30 pagi ini...

deg!

seperti ada yang menohok dada saya keras2...

selama ini setiap kali melihat beliau di mimbar, meskipun hanya sebentar untuk menyampaikan berkat sebelum jemaat pulang dan sharing beberapa patah kata mengenai kondisi beliau, saya selalu tidak bisa menahan air mata saya keluar...padahal sudah sekuat tenaga berusaha supaya butiran2 bening itu tidak meluncur, selalu saja saya tak kuasa. sampai-sampai teman2 saya yang melihat mata dan hidung saya merah mengira bahwa saya sakit, pilek atau flu.

saya tidak mengenal pak aming tjung secara personal. sejak pertama datang di GRII singapore, saya sempat heran, kenapa suara beliau tidak jelas, ternyata info dari seorang teman adalah karena beliau sedang menderita kanker, saya kurang ingat kanker di bagian mana, yang pasti kanker itu mengganggu kemampuan beliau untuk berkata-kata.

sebagai seorang pendeta, tentu saja kanker di bagian itu akan mengganggu kelancaran saat beliau berkotbah, hal yang menyakitkan bukan...saya melihat pak amin selalu berusaha keras untuk berbicara dengan jelas. saya bisa merasakan betapa susahnya untuk mengeluarkan satu patah kata.

kondisi beliau sempat membaik di akhir tahun 2006 sepengamatan saya, karena melihat rambut yang terkena efek kemoterapi sudah mulai tumbuh, dan beliau berkata-kata dengan lebih lancar, juga wajah yang lebih cerah. beberapa bulan lalu, beliau terkena radang di paru2 yang menyebabkan susah bernafas dan kembali susah berbicara.

saya masih ingat perkataan beliau kira2 3 atau 4 minggu yang lalu, saat beliau bercerita bahwa untuk berjalan berdiri saja susah bukan main, tapi kalau hari minggu tiba, seolah-olah ada kekuatan yang membawa pak amin mampu untuk datang ke gereja. kekuatan untuk dengar firman, memberikan salam berkat, bertemu dengan jemaat dan rekan-rekan seiman. 'tetaplah setia berdoa' itu pesan yang saya ingat seusai sharingnya.

pdt stephen tong pernah berkomentar tentang pak amin, yang menurutnya dianggap 'bebal' karena tidak mau beristirahat dan berhenti dari aktivitas, karena semangat melayani Tuhan sangat besar dan menggebu.

saya tak tahu bagaimana kalau hal seperti itu terjadi pada saya.

apakah saya akan mengeluh dan merengek pada Tuhan?

apakah saya akan 'mogok' dari aktivitas?

apakah saya akan menangis sepanjang waktu?

atau...

apakah saya akan tetap semangat seperti pak amin?

apakah saya akan setia melayani Tuhan tanpa compaint?

apakah saya bisa tetap tersenyum?

saya jadi malu.

dengan kondisi yang sehat dan tidak kekurangan apa-apa seperti saat ini, saya masih sering merengek dan mengeluh. saya tidak melihat berkat Tuhan dari perspektif yang lain, tapi terjebak dengan kacamata duniawi yang melihat dengan cara yang berbeda.

pak amin selamat jalan pak...saya percaya Bapa di surga menyambut kedatanganmu dengan penuh sukacita karena engkau mencapai garis finish dan mendapatkan mahkotamu. saya akan senantiasa mengingat sosok bapak, sebagai seorang yang memberikan warna dan teladan dalam hidup saya.

setiap kali saya akan mengeluh, biarlah saya mengingat engkau.

setiap kali saya sakit, biarlah saya meneladani engkau.

kiranya semangatmu boleh menular kepada saya, untuk setia dan mencintai Tuhan sampai akhirnya.

Amin.

Selly & Windy's last day

yesterday we held farewell gathering with the team for selly and windy. yesterday is selly's last day, but for windy is on next tuesday. since the days were closely, we wanted to celebrated it together. unfortunately windy didn't feel well, so she left the office after lunch.

i bought canadian pizza and five variable choices from Golden pillow. the celebration was not really cheerful as i was expected, as some of friends seemed not in good mood, few more were not in place (as we delayed the gathering as suddenly my team had an meeting) and few more seemed still busy.

anyway, after the gathering, i talked to selly and hao yauw. we talked a lot about architect, bad working hours, project management and our expectation. i was happy to know that we could pump up hao yauw's mood for his ten days more of joining KLCC competition. those team has been working non-stop even for weekend for one month.

i will miss all these new friends...starting from hangga (whom i don't know him well since he left office on my first week), jing shyan (our technical officer), hoay san (a malay cute girl who is very cheerful), selly (a smart girl!) and windy (who has made us especially indonesian team becoming happier with her gossip, jokes and everything), the next coming will be joanne and hao yauw...

friends come and go, but they will still be in my mind and my heart...

convocation

i just joined the convocation on july 10, 2007 in NUS. it's a nice event (in term of meeting your classmates and taking pictures) but not as warm as the convocation in indonesia. here, the graduates don't have a tradition to use their national costumes (especially for women, for men usually they can use formal suits as usual). i thought that is the culture of convocation in singaore, as i wonder whether they have their own national costumes or not. from a singaporean friend, i knew that they don't have such a national costume, but they have chinese suits, indian suits and malay suits. it's not like a festive convocation i had in Petra, where the girls and moms dressed nicely, prepare hairdo and make up.

when i came to the university hall, the place where the convocation was held, i thought i am the one who use traditional costume on that event, until i saw some of myanmar friends also use their national costume.

by the way, it's a lovely night to be spent with family and friends, especially my family who always be my supporters in every condition.

some of the pics show you who are my supporters who came on my convocation (feel sad that my dad couldn't join us on the convocation, but i plan to buy the academic gown, to take some pictures with the whole family in the end of the year)...^^

How Great Thou Art

A Swedian Pastor named Carl Boberg met a weather-bound. Heavy rain with a scary storm made him on a fear and trembling situation. In the middle of the ocean, he was contemplate by himself, and found that all of that things are made by God. If God can make storm and amazing universe easily, isn’t He a Great God? Then Carl Boberg started to make a poem and singing from it and praying also. After he made that song and singing, he then looks a clear sky comes. Birds are singing together, calm wind go through his boat and his breath. He more to praise God, and Jesus Christ also, his Savior Lord.

On 1886, How Great Thou Art, (the original caption : O Store God) :

Verse 1 :
O Lord my God when I in awesome wonder, Consider all the worlds Thy hands have made. I see the stars, I hear the rolling thunder Thy power throughout the universe displayed.
(how great this universe done and providence by Great God)



Chorus :
Then sings my soul, my Saviour God to Thee, How great Thou art, how great Thou art! Then sings my soul, my Saviour God to Thee,How great Thou art, how great Thou art!
(Let our soul singing together how great Thou art)

Verse 2 :
And when I think that God His son not sparing, Sent Him to die I scarce can take it in. That on the cross my burden gladly bearing, He bled and died to take away my sin.
(how great HIS love for us till Jesus died on the cross to save our life)

Verse 3 :
When Christ shall come with shouts of acclamation,And take me home, what joy shall fill my heart. Then I shall bow in humble admiration, And there proclaim, my God how great Thou art. (how great our joy filled our heart, and proclaim how great Thou art)

agreement ^^

setelah bete2, mbendol2, ngambul dan konsolidasi hehehe...
terjadilah perjanjian antar dua negara, dengan perwakilan dari singapore dan indonesia.

dengan demikian diumumkan bahwa telah terjadi kesepakatan antar dua belah pihak bahwa:

1. pukul 11 malam waktu singapore dan pukul 10 malam waktu indonesia bagian barat adalah jam malam untuk kedua negara, sehingga diharapkan agar segenap masyarakat segera memulai tidur malamnya.

2. pukul 6 pagi waktu singapore dan pukul 5 pagi waktu indonesia bagian barat adalah jam pagi untuk kedua negara, sehingga diharapkan segera bangun dan tidak tidur kembali.

3. bagi kedua negara, diharapkan saling mengingatkan supaya keduanya dapat mematuhi kesepakatan yang telah disepakati dengan saling memberitahu lewat teleon, sms ataupun yahoo messenger.

4. bagi pihak yang tidak menaati peraturan-peraturan tersebut diatas, akan dikenakan sangsi per harinya untuk menulis satu kali dalam blog ini dengan menggunakan bahasa inggris sebagai bahasa pengantar yang resmi bagi kedua negara.

dengan demikian telah disepakati perjanjian kedua negara, tertanggal 17 juli 2007 untuk dipatuhi dan dilaksanakan dengan sebaik-baiknya.

ps. ini baru hari pertama, tapi aku dah kena hukuman karena ga bisa bangun pagi hehehe ^^, jadinya ak tulis deh blognya setelah sekian lama, ga pakai bhs inggris dulu ya, soalnya kan nulis agreement-nya dulu...

hon,
asalkan kau memberi semangat dan mencintaiku,
sekali mendayung empat lima pulau terlampaui,
melebihi yang kau ingini...

cieeeeeeee...ada yg ngomong kayak gitu ke aku tadi sore lho...

squeeze!!!

this evening i heard the priest again talking about 'squeeze yourself'. i just wrote about 'use it to the fullest' this afternoon and heard he said about squeezing made me think about myself.

i think, the priest is maybe the one that always try to make every single moment, single minute worthed. for example when he was on the plane, he can read and memorize, or draw and design church, think or compose a song, etc. it seems like he always try to make everyday to be meaningful and fruitful.

let's not wasting our time!
let's not wasting our talents!
for God has been so good to us...
and our race in this world is to get the crown...
after we finish the race,
after we try our best,
after we squeeeze ourselves,
all we do is not for our satisfaction...
but for Him!
for His glory!

let's not throw away even a minute from your life...
come on...start from now..
don't wait until tomorrow!
cheers ^^

use it to the fullest!

we often waste our time and money.

i feel like that.

i have a 'can be called' high end notebook but i haven't use it to the fullest. so what's the meaning of having a high tech machine like that?

i have a 'can be called' multi features handphone but i never use all the features, i just use it for phone and sms only.

i have a good MP3 player and recorder, but after finish my study i never use it to the fullest, i just use the 1 GB memory to share files between office and my laptop.

i have a great digital camera at its time. I think just this technology that i think very helpful for me, brothers and family.

so...please think and think and think before you buy something that require a bulk of dollars from your pocket but you won't use it to the fullest.

One Liter of Tears

15 year old Ikeuchi Aya was an ordinary girl, the daughter of a family who works at a tofu shop, and a soon to be high schooler. However, odd things have been happening to Aya lately. She has been falling down often and walks strange. Her mother, Shioka, takes Aya to see the doctor, and he informs Shioka that Aya has spinocerebellar degenaration, a terrible disease where the cerebellum of the brain gradually deteriorates to the point where the victim cannot walk, speak, write, or eat. A cruel disease, as it does not affect the mind in the least. How will Aya react when told about her disease? And how will Aya live from now on?
10 episodes of the film One Liter of Tears make all of us realize that life is so short to live in but long also if we do not make it meaningful. Aya made everyone think about the meaning of life. She is so cheerful that make all of people around her forget what kind of disease on her. Aya died on 25 years old, but she still alive in her family’s hearts and the people who read her diaries. Aya always do her best, trying till the end of her life. She can’t do many things, but the only thing that she could do is writing, influence so many people. She said that she must write for others or she will do nothing in this life. The only thing that she thought is helping others. Wonderful, lovely, touching film, great job to Erika Sawajiri, you already made one liter of tears of mine.

sayang

hon, sayang aku sama kamu

my flats...

First Flat:
Teban Gardens Road
Ownernya si Audrey yang tiap bulan pasti pengen ketemu sama anak2 flat buat ngecek rumahnya trus ngajak kita dinner. kalo pas dianya ga bisa, pasti kita dikasi duit buat dinner sendiri without her....hehehe baik ya ^^

anak2 flat: dita, rita, melissa, laura, nelly

Flat ini depannya langsung Pandan Reservoir, trus dekat sama daerah industri gitu. yang enaknya, di lantai bawah langsung ada hawker...hahaha yg dipikiri makanan terus...hehehe...

I lived here from end of July 2006 - early May 2007. Salah satu ruangan yang didekor bagus ma si owner tuh kitchennya...

Second Flat:
Toa Payoh
Flat yang ini lebih dekat ke daerah central, trus sekitarnya banyak toko, tempat makan, bus dan deket MRT. owner kayaknya orang kaya, cowok ,masih single...hehehe...interiornya ditata bagus, master bedroomnya pa lagi. kalo dari sini ke kantor, bisa 2 macem transport: naik bus sekitar 30 menitan, naek mrt sekitar 20 menitan.

living area @ toa payoh

I live here starting from mid of May 2007...Di sini yang asyik itu, kitchennya lengkap semuanya, ditinggalin peralatannya sama si owner...trus lagi lengkap dah. Lina pelihara hamster, Dessy pelihara kura2...Dita mau pelihara apa ya...???

lembur

kemaren pertama kali lembur sampe 9.30pm. uda lumayan sepi, tinggal 3 org di bay sebelah lagi siapin competisi gitu, trus yg 1 lagi di bay ujung nun jauh di sana. di bay aku tinggal ak sendiri...

mata uda capek , seharian ini banyak yang dikerjain, masih ada yg salah2 juga, lupa kasi inilah, itulah...

pagi2 mestinya uda bikin daftar apa aja yang maunya dikerjain gitu, tapinya karena tiba2 boss datang dan minta ini itu, prioritas dia harus didahulukan dong ya...jadinya berubah semuanya deh...masihbanyak sih yg harus dikerjain lagi. mestinya hari ini tadi mau lembur lagi, tapi uda ah, ak di rumah aja, ngerjain d rumah baru senin dibawa ke kantor.mana blm bersih2 rumah dsbnya lagi...

td pagi uda disms si 'dita' kembaranku...hehehe...diajak bareng k kantor tapi akunya masih capek. semalaman nungguin si bapak satu itu ternyata ditinggal tidur ma dia...payah dah. pagi2 kebangun, gara2 stres semalaman langsung buat indomie dah...hehehehe ^^ duh jadi endut ni...

hari ini rencana mau buat programme buat kantor, biar sekalian belajar sama gampang trackingnya aja...harus selesai dah mlm ini...jia you!!!

bsk mo ke NUS balikin buku, uda kena denda hohoho...trusnya mo bolos katekisasi aja hahaha (kagak niat iki dita)...joking^^

anyway...kayaknya ak bisa bertahan di kantor, dan harus bertahan...memang harus belajar survive nih...pasti bisa, harus bisa!!! semangat!!!

promise

what is important with promise?

what is promise?

why it is important for me?

i hate when people easily say a promise but can't remember it, can't fulfill the promise he made by himself. it's better you keep silent than you say something that you will forget. it's better to say that you can't do it rather than you say you will do but you won't. it makes me hoping too much. too much energy used for just thinking and waiting for forgettable promise.

sepi

sepi...sepi...sepi...

working

I have been working for 8 days!!!

Thanks God for everything He gave me.
Actually this job kinda challenge to me as it pushes me to study and prepare everything by myself. Can say that I have to be 'greatly independent'. I just thought that 'ok, they know me as graduated master student, they must expect me to do something without a need to tell me how to do it'.

Many things happen since my first day working, I don't want to write those down here as remembering those things will just blow out my spirit and happiness. What I usually do in the morning before I enter the Studio 1@3 door is reminding myself that I need to be the light and the spirit for my team members. I can't just always feel guilty, sad, and self pity. I need to stand and bring the cheerfulness to the bay.

I still don't know how to do my work correctly, but hope that this week I can finish the programme first than take the action starting on Monday. God don't let me walk alone...I'm sure about it.

Remembering that He is with me, it makes me happy...^^

just give thanks...!

beberapa minggu ini capek banget, rasanya badan sudah hampir-hampir ga kuat, padahal mau exam...final exam lagi...pertempuran terakhir, tapi kok semangat kayaknya loyo...hehehe...

banyak pergumulan terjadi, kalau ngelihat wajah di cermin kayaknya serasa jadi lebih tua beberapa tahun karena kebanyakan mikir...hehehe...takuttttttttt...

masalah kerjaan terutama. menyita sebagian besar energi. mulai dari searching, siap2in portfolio-cover letter-resume, ngirimnya, ditelponin, interview (ini aja terbagi dari beberapa section lagi: mandi, keramas, make up, setrika baju, cari alamat kantor itu, pelajari web kantornya, dll), nego salary (yang paling bete kalu bener2 dikasi salary yang rendah banget...hiks).

anyway, aku mau tetep bersyukur, Tuhan sudah kasi kekuatan sampai pada hari ini. Seperti kata Maudy, He has guided me until today, He will always guide me in the future. Seperti di blognya bu Altre ditulis, Tuhan itu Allah dan sahabat kita, Dia yang menanamkan telinga, masakan tidak mendengar seruan kita, Dia yang menciptakan mata, masakan Dia tidak memandang kita yang memerlukanNya. All I have to do now, is to count my blessing, for remember that He will never leave me alone.

In good and bad time...just give thanks! Seperti dalam pergumulan Ayub, dia berkata pada istrinya, masakan kita hanya mau yang baik saja dari Tuhan dan menolak yang jelek. Sekarang mungkin belum waktunya buat aku mendapat yang terbaik dari Tuhan. Pasti akan datang waktunya dimana Dia menunjukkan yang terbaik buat aku. I lift my hope in You, Lord.

I want to give thanks for everything.
For the chances I got even I still don't get what is right.
For the daily living day by day.
For my health, friends and family.
For every single thing in my life...
I want to give thanks to You...

making decision in this life is not easy anyway...(1)

do you think it is easy to make a decision...if that is the decision for your life, for the WHOLE of your life...for me it is NOT EASY AT ALL!!!!

really not easy!!!

i even can't write anything now, although i have so many things inside my head even i have talked to san for 50 minutes! (this is really the first time he felt he needed to call me and let his pulse finished in one go) - thanks bun, i love you so much!... there are still a lot of ideas, conflicts in my mind.

one clue: this is about 'job hunting'.

i am going to finish my course this early of May. i need to quickly find a job.

why?

• i need to continue my life, paying room rental, food, transportation, etc.
• i need to pay back tuition fee loan.
• i want to give back to my parents
• i want to save some money for future needed (marriage, school, house?, car?)

what kind of job?

• it is suggested not to continue working in project management field. it leads you to be a leader, a project manager who manage and control.
• it is suggested to continue working as an architect who does drawing and detailing. it sounds more appropriate as a woman (who will be a wife also) to maintain a character of caring, documenting and detailing.

so, what's the problem?

• of course it is a problem! (maybe a problem for me who doesn't know what God exactly wants me to be, not realize where He is going to guide me...hikz)

to be continued...

Eeyore Theology

“Eeyore theology”?

Eeyore, Winnie-the-Pooh’s gloomy donkey friend, always walks slowly with his head down. He sees the negative side of everything.

When we see the value of each moment and live in the glory of our redemption and the joy of our blessings in Christ, we show our delight in God to our children and grandchildren (Psalm 90:16-17).

When trials assail and my moods descend,
When pain and sorrow seem never to end,
I yield to You, Lord,
so that I may seeThe peace and the joy You’ve promised me.
—Fitzhugh

You won’t be a child of despair if you remember your Father’s care.

Let the beauty of the Lord our God be upon us, and establish the work of our hands. —Psalm 90:17

some quotes that blessed me today, taken from Our Daily Bread, March 26, 2007

It's all about Him!

Sometimes our plans break down and our efforts fall short.
When things happen that we can’t control, we must “keep on travelin’” and remember where the real power for godly living and true praise comes from.
When our efforts falter, we need to keep praising and lifting up Jesus.
It’s all about Him anyway.

—Dave Branon
taken from Our Daily Bread, March 23, 2007

lonely...

what a very lonely twentieth :(
...
...
...
so lonely...

i'm protecting myself...

semakin hari aku semakin sadar...
aku terlalu rapuh,
terlalu sensitif,
takut hati terluka,
terlalu menjaga hati,
takut kalau-kalau terluka lebih dalam lagi...

semasa kecil yang pernah aku ingat, ada yang pernah celetuk sebuah kalimat ke aku 'kamu ini terlalu baik banget, ga bisa nolak, ga bisa tegas, jadinya teman2mu suka manfaatkan kamu'
mungkin saat itu karena aku suka seringkali sebel, karena dikecewakan teman. mungkin juga saat itu aku sering mengeluh, kalau temanku berprasangka buruk, padahal bukan aku yang melakukan. semakin dipikir, semakin aku membuat benteng-benteng di sekelilingku, pasang tameng-tameng di depanku.

i'm protecting myself. dengan tidak turut campur terlalu banyak. tidak menyentuh kehidupan orang lain terlalu jauh. ataupun tidak mau tahu terlalu dalam. karena apa? karena takut suatu saat bisa-bisa melukai diriku sendiri.

kotbah kemarin bilang: kalau kita mengasihi, meskipun kita dilukai, kita tetap bisa bertahan, karena kita mau mengasihi dia. meskipun dikecewakan, kita masih tetap bisa mengasihi dia, bukan malah menjauhi dia, nyuekin dia, tapi kita justru bertumbuh dalam kasih ke dia.

Yesus aja berapa banyak dikecewakan, dilukai, dibuat sedih, ditolak...tapi karena kasihNya begitu besar, dia tetap mengasihi manusia.

waktu aku belajar mengasihi, ketakutan-ketakutan akan dikecewakan mulai luntur. mengasihi bisa lebih dengan tulus, bukan dengan pengharapan akan imbalan, atau paranoia akan sakit hati.

berdoa buat aku ya...supaya tameng-tamengku bisa lepas satu persatu. belajar mengasihi lebih tulus. kalau pun aku dikecewakan, aku percaya...Yesus sanggup menghapus duka hatiku.

keliling dunia yuk...

keliling dunia? uihhhhhh...mau banget dong...

dari kecil, aku paling suka ngelihatin gambar2 pemandangan luar negeri yang keren2, bunga warna warni, 4 musim, salju wow...pengen pegang ^^, perahu2, gunung2, padang rumput, kota2, tampat2 wisata...hmmm...mau...

sampe2 ni...bela2in minta dikirimin brosur salah satu lembaga pendidikan bahasa yg ngadain tour liburan gitu cuma karena kepengen ngelihat foto2nya sambil mimpi2...'kapan ya aku kesana...'

mau dong...jalan2 ke seluruh dunia...pengen rasanya...tapi blm mampu ^^
malah ke singapore uda bolak balik, eh ketrima sekolah ya di singapore lagi, ntar kerja ya di singapore lagi...mana ntar kalo uda married belum tentu bisa jalan2 sesuka hati aku kan ya...
mumpung masih belum terikat, belum punya anak, pengen jalan2 sepuasnya (tapi benere lho dit, apa ya bisa puas kamu? mau jalan2 kemana lagi? dunia luas kayak gini...bisa2 kalo nunggu keliling dunia ga married2 ^^)

kesempatan jalan ke suatu tempat, yang baru, yang bersejarah...buat yang bisa mengalaminya, jgn disia2kan deh! blessing deh beneran... kata pdt Stephen Tong, kalau kalian jalan2 ke suatu tempat, persiapkan bener2 sebelum pergi. cari tahu data2nya, cerita2nya, agendakan jadwalmu dgn teliti, supaya setiap waktu disana bener2 jadi sesuatu yang bermakna. bukan sekedar 'gaya' aja bisa sampai kesana, tapi kamu belajar sesuatu, kenali sejarahnya, keunikannya...bukan cuma shopping aja yang dipikir, atau sekedar foto2 aja sebagai bukti udah pernah nampe kesana.

dipikir2 ya untunglah aku bisa denger pak Tong sebelum aku mungkin di suatu saat berkesempatan pergi ke tempat2 yg aku idam2kan. belajar bersabar kali ya, belajar menabung, belajar bijaksana memilih tempat yang mau dikunjungi, ga sekedar buat having fun, tapi lebih ke arah pembelajaran diri sendiri.

kita yang diberkati bisa pergi ke negara2 lain, mesti bertanggung jawab dengan kesempatan yang sudah Tuhan beri. bukan untuk foya2, tapi untuk memperkaya diri dengan pengetahuan yang sedemikian luasnya...dan untuk mengagumi kemaha-luar-biasa-nya Tuhan kita.

i'm dreaming and praying for the chances for going around. i won't be regret if God don't allow me to have it. but if He gives me, i will not abandon it. thanks God.

lazy?

i don't realize that it has been some time since my last posting to this blog. exactly a month!!!
am i so lazy? am i not capable to maintain this blog?

maybe yes. maybe no.

this is my first time having a blog. even sometimes i forget if i HAVE a blog! so funny... that's because i don't have a good commitment, not spare a special time to write, at least once in a week, or once in a month (hehehe ^^ ).

i'm really really busy...for my study especially for the papers, group assignments and exam preparation. i haven't prepare myself for exam. that makes me worried.

i just feel that time is really fast. i'm now already in week 9 in my course. my study will be almost complete in the end of April.

so what's next in my life? i don't know. really don't know.

am i lazy?
for not updating this blog?
for not finishing the assignments quickly?
for not preparing my future life?

what i need is a proper time management. and maybe additional time...but it won't be happen for sure.

time is asset.
time is opportunity.
i am not lazy, i think. sometimes maybe. (hehehe) but what i want to do is to make every time meaningful, to use it wisely.

i hope that i can be wiser, from now on...when i realized ... again...
"the meaning of time..."

...long distance relationship???...(part 3-the end)

Living far away from the person we're used to live with is not easy. It is true! It works in me although I know that I am the kind of person who won't give up for everything, the person who will struggle to reach the focus I dream on.

When I was in the college, I always found so many people give hands to help me, give heart and ears to listen to me, give hugs when I was sad. It's not so easy like that when I move to continue my study in Singapore eventhough I have dear flatmates who are so nice to me. There's something missing...

Realizing that I would be on a long distance relationship made me think about it hundred times. San and I tried to refer to some friends who is able to go through out the range of time and distance between the couples. They had variative cases and I believe that many problems they faced.

* a couple with more than two years LDR, but still in in the same country, happy ending
* a couple with more than four years LDR, also in the same country, happy ending
* a couple with more than seven years LDR, in the different country, happy ending

We knew some couples didn't experience a happy ending though, but trying to think positively, we learn about how the success couple went through the problems arise from the distance itself. San came out with the conclusion that 'communication' and 'trust' are the solution. We are very lucky that we have our own notebooks, internet connection at home *thanks to StarHub and Speedy!!!*, YM, Skype, GoggleTalk, email, cheap calling card, handphone *thanks to XL that can receive email from YM...hehehe*. There's no barrier anymore for communication and it won't be a problem anymore. Moreover, trust can be built from a very good communication between each other.

The essential point above all of this is that 'to believe our Father in heaven'. He is the one who permit and plan us to be separated by the ocean. He has a purpose in doing that and we just couldn't go beyond our mind to understand what He wants. Giving Him all our burdens will help us to calm ourselves to enjoying His patience and love everytime. He is here with us, everytime, not just when we need Him. He won't let us alone. He is in our heart.

Bun,
Whenever you feel lonely, close your eyes...
put your hand on your heart...and you will find me...
inside your heart...

...long distance relationship???...(part 2)

Just a few minutes after finishing writing the part 1 -and honestly, I didn't plan that I will write the part 2 today- I read the online Our Daily Bread as usual, and this sentences below is there:

...Do you find yourself in a "wilderness" experience, isolated from friends and family? If so, the Lord may want to teach you lessons of faith and endurance that you could never learn in a busy crowd...

I am now isolated from beloved friends and family and boyfriend. Soooooo amazzzzinggg that I found the answer so fast. It is a wonderful experience. What will I write in the part 2 actually still mess up in my mind. But the passage I read in ODB give me the solution and conclusion about what I shall learn in this new life in Singapore.

I really want to experience the lessons of faith and endurance from God. I believe that it will complete me to be a wonderful woman loved by God.

Thanks God for today.

...long distance relationship???...(part 1)

...
that question were always on my mind since I knew him...
I thought that I am a kind of person who wouldn't be strong enough to go into long distance relationship (LDR) :)
I am a kind of person who really like to stay around my lovely family, friends and boyfriend-of course. Imagining that I would stay far away from all of people that I love...it makes me sad.

I miss u all...

...to be continued...
(in the middle of busy day of doing assignments)

In His Hand.........

(A poem for Dita)


Dia begitu indah
Dia begitu sempurna
Dia begitu anggun
Dia bernama Kristus

Aku terkesima
Aku terhenyak
Aku terpana
Aku …….tak bisa berkata-kata

Kusampaikan salamku untuk Dita
Selamat menemukan hidup di tangan Dia
Terus berkarya bersama-Nya
Di dalam genggaman ajaib tangan-Nya

a beginning...

I used to write starting when I was able to write and then to type using a very old 'brother' typewriter. I liked to write poems, story and sometimes a very long fiction. I don't remember exactly when I stopped to write. It seemed that school activities, church services and anything else won most of my time.

Seeing many friends having their own blog, made me feel so interested in also having it. But ... again ... the school time, working time was on my priority at that time.

Now, why I start to open this blog is also because of my 'bunny' who always support me to have a blog to share OUR thought and experiences in life. I thought it is a good idea, which I can keep all of my writing in a very good place (I'am a messy girl...) and also to share it to everyone who keen to have a look :)

Well...I don't want to write such a long for a simple beginning...

Have a nice day to you all!!!